CrimsonIdol8

She's beautiful Everything about her The way she smiles The way she laughs The way she approaches life Thoughtfully and carefully Yet so spontaneously She's a dream But a nightmare Ideas and emotions Colours and images All mixed up Indescribable Unintelligible Bursting out of her skin And running into the wilderness She confounds everyone she meets But none more so than me She weakens my knees Makes me fall over myself Behave like a crazy person And act like a fool I look into her eyes And I want to hold her And just kiss her Tell her that she's my world I don't want to scare her away But I have no time to lose Nor

Can't feel you any more No longer by my side Lost passion, emptiness I don't know where you are What are you doing now? What are you going through? I am going insane Wandering for your love Starved of your affection I am punishing me For what I did to you So hastily, it can't It cannot be changed now I threw your heart away So recklessly, I can't I can't forgive myself Why should you forgive me You will never forgive Then why should I care now About your refusal Of my apology You don't care about me No longer, not any more You say you are not lost But I can see through you Behind your mask, your face You are lost, no

All roads seem hopeless My choices and actions present Decision difficulty that endures How can I choose a way When they lead to that place Where it all fractures In the throes of broken dreams I can't do this I need to switch off Let the moments decide Of what to do with The weights in my hands I'm so tired I just want to sleep It's going too fast Slow down You're leaving me behind Please don't leave me here

I don't believe in God I've never accepted fate But as my body deteriorates The more I realise There are transpirations That I cannot explain What is the reason For our actions Do we have free will Or do events occur For a purpose Is there a plan It is nice to think That our trials and tribulations Are not for nothing That this bane It all has a reason They're just our tests Tests we're meant to conquer To get us to that point Of contention in our lives Where we're happy Loving and in love Forever connection bound Such is the appeal of fate The so called master plan It is a creature comfort In the face of uncertaint

The fire angel Hair so red Her dress so blue Femme fatale Her eyes are irresistible She's heavenly But evil Beautiful Such a vision Deadly She burns to the touch She lives on my shoulder Whispering endless nothings She represents heaven The good Dreams Hopes Convictions Love Courage Faith Angels are inhuman Yet, they are more human than you think She is angelus With her blue grace But she is fire With her red black Her fire Her passion Her rage Her manipulation Her selfishness Her capacity for hate It constantly pulls In an internal power struggle For dominance And so she whispers Endless nothing Influen

I forgive them For they suffer as I do At the hands of their angels and demons But I resist For I am revolution Defiant Nothing is good Nothing is evil Black and white is a lie There is only grey The human condition We are grey But there is light One guide Certainty in uncertainty Truth It is constant It is not good It is not evil It just is Let truth guide you Search for yourself This is your mission You have your own truth And it can never be pulled Angel of Fire Demon of Soul You have no power here My thoughts are mine My feelings are mine My choices are mine My decision Trust in me Fire and soul Be quiet

Our last encounter Was heart wrenching The promise of absence Drew our tears But the reality is It wasn't going to stick Your presence remained And haunted me My presence remained And haunted you My thoughts unfiltered Always came back to you Now to see you again It begs many questions Will your eyes Stare right through Will your smile Buckle my knees Will the possibility of us Be too powerful to resist I think I know The answers already It was powerful enough To change my life before I don't see it being Any different now

To risk is to live There's nothing more exciting Nor more terrifying Than living on a ledge Standing on the verge Of the fall There is nothing to gain From staying within your circle Seeking comfort from control It's the ultimate fallacy Take a step outside And experience being Remorse and regret These are the feelings You will come to know them Brought by the fear You've let consume Your faded soul Don't hide any more Release yourself Deep, dark desires Let them come forth Life is too fucking boring Not to try Do not be afraid As dominance slips grasp Fight back the doubt Seek the true direction Realise your own s

She's beautiful Everything about her The way she smiles The way she laughs The way she approaches life Thoughtfully and carefully Yet so spontaneously She's a dream But a nightmare Ideas and emotions Colours and images All mixed up Indescribable Unintelligible Bursting out of her skin And running into the wilderness She confounds everyone she meets But none more so than me She weakens my knees Makes me fall over myself Behave like a crazy person And act like a fool I look into her eyes And I want to hold her And just kiss her Tell her that she's my world I don't want to scare her away But I have no time to lose Nor

I don't want to give up Resign myself to letting go On the off chance you'll realise Everything I mean to you I don't believe it's fair That my desires go once again Unrealised And are forced Straight back down You stoked the fire My passionate fire My fire for you I can't extinguish it now You are my fight I am picking you It is time to go to war I will not lie down I will not let you run away again I will not stop coming Until you are finally mine This is my promise

An array of thoughts And complex emotions Pollute my frayed And exhausted mind No matter what I do Or where I go All roads lead to nowhere Or to a personal hell If I go the way Of my former Whose to say anything positive Of our future Our actions after dissolution Will haunt us everyday And not facing these transgressions Will hurtle us back to past mistakes I still love her so She will always be my girl But I can't forgive, or forget She will always be betrayer If I go the way Of my desire What will become of my heart Or my pride There are many questions Will she accept me And I'm so scared of losing her Will she l